The Montreal Canadiens organization would like to announce the hiring of GM Zach Brideau. 

"This franchise has shown sucess in the past and it's my job to contiune that, but with that said I feel it's time to start the process of a rebuild so we can compete for years to come. With my first couple moves i've traded Nic Dowd to the St.Louis Blues For Prospect Liam Arnsby. I'd like to wish Nic all the best with the Blues, also I have Fired Peter Deboer and have Hired Mike Yeo as the New Head Coach.

With not having a 1st round pick in 2024 the Canadiens will be in the market for one.

The Carolina Hurricanes have hired a new General Manager, Alex Wyatt, to take the helm of the franchise and build on their recent success. 

Despite the swap at the helm, Carolina made the playoffs last year, has a roster filled with solid talent who've all performed admirably. There was no need to open up the flood gates, tear down to the studs, shave the landing strip, or any other typically used euphemism for a scorched earth rebuild when Wyatt was handed the keys. He knows the previous man in his position well, and had nothing but compliments for him as he cleaned out the remaining possessions in the GM office. 

“I know Saqib well, we’ve managed against each other for years. I’m a little surprised there were only four goalies in the pro ranks, to be honest, but I knew we’d be set there for sure when I came in. I sent him a note of congratulations on Facebook messenger, three separate discord channels and in the comment section of a trade offer. He hasn’t responded yet but it’s only been about twelve weeks.”

Despite the good head start in Carolina, there was work to be done in Chicago and beyond. 

“My first order of business was to tackle the prospect pipeline. I had our scouts send me a report on our prospects and the average age of a player was 35 and most of them worked at Best Buy now. I thought that was strange because the Wolves (Carolina’s AHL affiliate) had 14 openings on an 18 man roster.”

Wyatt certainly got to work, making 18 picks in total in the entry draft, making most of his picks on shoddy cell phone reception, while dodging sneers from his wife and children for what they deemed ‘ruining the camping trip’. 

“You have to have priorities,” Wyatt said in regards to his draft weekend decisions. “My wife was concerned that the light from my cellphone was going to attract wolves, and given we were in the fifth round of the draft at that time, I told her that was precisely what I was trying to do.”

A snippet of his selections from the entry draft. 

Round One. 

Danila Yurov. 

A Russian winger with a knack for filling the net, Yurov bounced around all three levels of the Russian hockey system, performing decently at each one. Given the KHL’s penchant for playing promising young talent approximately thirteen seconds a night, his performance thus far bodes well. 

Round Two. 

No picks. 

Round Three. 

Rodwin Dionicio. 

An overager, and former forward, Dionicio was drafted as a defensemen. His underlying play driving metrics are off the charts, to the point a micro stats dork that the Canes’ scouting staff outsource 99% of their decision making tk said he received his highest score ever. Look for Dionicio to spend the vast majority of his career in the ECHL now. 

Round Four. 

Hudson Thornton. 

Thornton was already an overager, and passed through another league’s draft once again. Despite being top five in U20 scoring for defensemen in the WHL, ahead of the likes of Denton Mateychuk and in the company of Stan Svozil and Lukas Dragicevic, apparently only the Carolina staff can see the talent he provides. That, or he’s been blackballed by Avalanche GM, Jordan Wolfman. 

Round Five. 

Zam Plante. 

A defensively responsible forward with a high motor, Carolina’s scouts have a feeling his offensive upside should pair well enough to see him eventually rate well enough to provide bottom six depth at the NHL level. 

Round Six. 

Josh Davies. 

Another high motor forward who should be ready to send opposing players into the third row of the PNC Arena in a few years’ time. 

Round Seven. 

Jackson Edward. 

A violent penalty killer who was near the tops in PIMs in the OHL, while also boasting the top plus minus on a solid squad, the London Knights. He should feature in a bottom six role for Carolina eventually, before being cut to free agency after his ELC expires, then getting a $17 million dollar signing bonus on a $750k contract as a 76 rated player. 

The goal for Wyatt is clear, having taken over a team that was already set up well for NHL level success, it will be ensuring to maintain that talent with cap management and adding depth. Secondly, it will require being mindful that the team doesn’t lose focus on developing talent to fill gaps and continue to move forward on its goal of one day bringing the cup home to Raleigh. 

The fans, the players, management, and even the poor souls who get paid $14 an hour to fish the used condoms out of the urinals at PNC between periods, can’t wait for hockey to begin again soon. 

The HSHL was treated to a new GM for the Arizona Coyotes last year, Vince Aldrich. Some GM’s remember Mr.Aldrich for his short tenure in the DCHL as the GM of the Vinnipeg Jets. Mr. Aldrich was quoted as saying “The DCHL was full of assholes, HSHL is no different”

With a season record of 27-47-6 in his inaugural year for a total of 64 points Vinnius knew drastic changes needed to happen. “Last year was a huge disappointment, people were hired to play a role and they fell short” Darth says.” We will need over 100 points to make it into the post season, anything less is not acceptable. Tough choices had to be made and we made them. We have successfully completed  over 10 trades in the off season with teams like Ottawa, Detroit, Buffalo, Boston, Florida, Columbus, ST. Louis. Minnesota and Pittsburgh. We appreciate the talks great deals for everyone involved. Nobody got fucked over like what happened in Pittsburgh recently In my opinion Mike needs Jesus.”

With additions to the Yotes such as: Shayne Gostisbehere, Adam Hendrique, Ben Chiarot, Ivan Provorov, Kevin Shattenkirk, Anthony Duclair, Cam Fowler, Jonathan Huberdeau, Tristan Jarry, Andreas Athanasiou and our latest acquisitions Jake McCabe and Ryan Johansen. This reporter believes 100 points is inevitable.

2024 is the year of the Desert Dogs. Good luck Bitches.

T.Rex

With the 2023 HSHL Draft behind us, we are now able to look at the future of the Winnipeg Jets franchise. After a spectacular season, the Jets were able to capture the Central Division title and sat second only to the Oilers in the Western Conference. The Jets managed to push deep into the playoffs, eventually losing to the Vegas Golden Knights, in the Western Conference Final, in seven games after being down 3-1 in the series.

The Jets were able to grab Ivan Miroshnichenko with the 29th overall pick in the draft. Miroshnichenko looks to play another year in Russia, where he will then hopefully sign with the Jets after next season and look to make the jump to North America.

The future looks bright for the club. It’s expected the Reichel will play another season for the Manitoba Moose before likely taking over a middle 6 role for the Jets next season. The winger projects to be a top six winger, but with the depth and youth of the Jets at forward group, it will be a battle to secure himself within the top six. Ville Heinola is also expected to play another season for the Moose after the Jets signed Jeff Petry and Joel Edmundson to extensions. Heinola is expected to play on the top pair this season with Declan Chisholm and both are looking for their opportunity to make the jump to the Jets.

Joseph Woll is expected to be the starter for the Moose this season after the Jets signed Laurent Brossoit in free agency. Woll and Nico Daws are likely to split time 60/40 but it is still possible for Daws to leap ahead in the pecking order.

The remainder of the Jets top 10 prospects will continue to develop in the minors until they are ready to play for the Moose. The Jets faithful should be incredibly excited as they wait in anticipation for defenceman Brandt Clarke to crack the roster for the Jets, as it’s expected he will turn into their future number one. McDonough, Lucius and Martino will continue to play for their respective clubs in the NCAA, with McDonough likely playing for the Moose next season.

1) Lukas Reichel
2) Brandt Clarke
3) Ville Heinola
4) Ivan Miroshnichenko

5) Joseph Woll
6) Aiden McDonough
7) Declan Chisholm
8) Nico Daws

9) Cruz Lucius
10) Ayrton Martino
 

Hey errybody

Just wanted to quickly post the individual award winners

Conn Smythe (Playoff MVP): Buffalo Sabres D Cale Makar

Hart (Hshl MVP): Winnipeg Jets F Kirill Kaprizov

Art Ross (reg season point leaders): Ottawa Senators F Leon Draisaitl

Rocket Richard (top goal scorer reg season): Toronto Maple Leafs F Auston Matthews

Norris (best defensemen): Buffalo Sabres D Cale Makar

Vezina (best goalie): New york Islanders G Jacob Markstrom

Bobby Orr (top scoring dman): Buffalo Sabres D Cale Makar

Selke (best defensive forward): Winnipeg Jets F Anton Lundell

Calder (best rookie): Winnipeg Jets F Anton Lundell

Jennings (goalies on team with least goals allowed) New jersey Devils Gs Johnathan Quick/Cal peterson

Jack Adams (best gm): TBD? (prolly Buffalo)